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Mrs Hendy: Oh! I never knew that Schopenhauer was a philosopher!
Mr Hendy: Oh, yeah! He's the one that begins with an s [Pause.], like Nietzsche.
Mrs Hendy: Does Nietzsche begin with an S?
Mr Hendy: There's an s in Nietzsche.
Mrs Hendy: Oh, wow! Yes there is. Do all philosophers have an s in them?
Mr Hendy: Yeah, I think most of them do.
Mrs Hendy: Oh. Does that mean Selina Jones is a philosopher?
Mr Hendy: Right, she could be. She sings about the meaning of life.
Mrs Hendy: Yeah, that's right, but I don't think she writes her own material.
Mr Hendy: No. Maybe Schopenhauer writes her material?
Mrs Hendy: No. Burt Bacharach writes it.
Mr Hendy: There's no s in Burt Bacharach.
Mrs Hendy: Or in Hal David.
Mr Hendy: Who's Hal David?
Mrs Hendy: He writes the lyrics, Burt just writes the tunes, only now he's married to Carole Bayer Sager.
[Pause.]
Mr Hendy: Waiter! This conversation isn't very good!

-- Monty Python's The Meaning of Life (1983)